Real talk ….

My daughter‘s birthday was yesterday and she turned 15 years old. It’s been a struggle for her to get excited about her day. She told me she doesn’t want to get older. Now, I am not sure if it’s because she is looking for a surprise day like an 90’s teen movie. Or that she really feels a pull to stay in the past to somehow hold on to her youth (As if…). Is this really something we feel at every age? That daunting thought of getting older. What can a middle aged perimenopauseal woman say to appease the mind if this blooming babe? Each time I enter an elevator with mirrors I cringe at the amount of lines overhead lighting can enhance. Let’s not even start with dressing rooms.

Raising girls to feel safe and comfortable in their own skin comes from the example I have to set. No words can teach this yet. Though if I tried they certainly would fall upon deaf ears. Wink wink… kids, am I right?! So, here I am trying to find the way to love myself better with a healthy diet, exercise, and of course my usual dose of bio identical hormones HTR.  Very demure, very mindful. But if I mention any one of my insecurities I can see that this example rubs off quickly. Over the years I have had to correct many self loathing behaviors and show how I wish my girls would think and speak about themselves. From this I learned. For them I changed. I found my way out of the pit of disparity and truly began to love my flaws. I try to see my wrinkles, gray hairs, receding hairline, stretch marks and sagging skin as distinct characteristics that make up who I am in a beautiful way. They say my name loud and clear. And what can be wrong is that?

Our talks about self-worth have become moments of growth for all of us as I help my girls find their strength. I’ve learned that it’s OK to let them see me working through my own journey too. And that they don’t need a flawless role model just an honest one. We’re all learning that self-love isn’t a destination, it’s a journey we take together one small, kind step at a time.